The reports of death were greatly exaggerated

Ok... so we didn't really get chewed out per se... my coworker was just really hard on himself for what happened and really expected he'd get fired or something (doesn't that sound familiar? =P). But it seems things are ok now... so it's back to business and working hard to ensure we don't mess up again.

Thanks all for your kind words. I have to remind myself that I really am not alone here.

More music...

Moxy Fruvous - Stuck In The 90's

"Back in his day job this afternoon.
Unlikely he'll move down to Cuba soon.
Reluctant to find he's stuck in the 90's again."

Moxy Fruvous - B.J. Don't Cry

"B.J. don't cry no more.
Wonders what his heart is beating for.
He says he takes it much too hard.
Give my regards to B.J."

When things go bad, you often wonder if you should be here

In case you're thinking this is a suicide post, don't worry. That's one avenue I won't really be taking that easily. The only 'suicidal' death I will accept is if it is because I joined the military. Heh... even that sounds appealing now...

Well, just that I come to work today just to find out that our team has made a screwup again and will be getting chewed out for it despite the fact that it's not entirely our fault. However, this team has been everyone's scape goat for far too long. Worse off, my shift and the shift adjacent to it has only 2 people while the other 2 shifts enjoy having 3 people. That's rather unfair seeing that something like this could have been avoided if we had the extra person. Not exactly the best reason, but plus the fact that in a way, I've been working on a two person shift for more than a year now, it really irritates me.

I got an email today that's supposed to be of a speech by Steve Jobs back in June. It's one of those motivational ones that just tells you to get out there, find your dream, live it, and tell the world to fuck off basically. You know, days like this only serve to make me wonder if I have really just allowed myself to cower in fear and uncertainty to be able to do anything right. Have I really become that self-conscientious? I think so, but then, someone did say that I'm just being my own worst critic and just being hard on myself too much than I deserve. Something is wrong with me, that's for sure. I don't have the drive, the decisiveness, nor the time-management to get anything done. So, no kidding that I'm hard on myself... just that, nothing has changed...

This cancer crab needs to break out of his shell...

00:22 EDIT: Now that I've recomposed myself a bit, my mind suddenly wandered to this song:

"Be not afraid. I go before you always. Come, follow Me, and I will give you rest."

Ga Tung songs are good for the soul... I miss those years.

RIP Baby Chui. 07/18/1993 - 10/14/2005

The house is a lot emptier without him. He's always been such a cute and good dog. My sister loved him very much all the way to the bitter end. She's going to miss him the most because he's been her constant companion for the past 10 years that we've had him. It's going to be a hard week or so.

Baby was diagnosed with what I suppose we could say was stomach cancer of some type. He hadn't been able to keep his food down since August and was always vomitting after meals. We just thought that he sneakily ate something bad from the backyard all the time. But when it became regular, my sis took him to the vet and got him some special medicated food. When that didn't work, my sis took him back for a complete diagnosis. They stuck a camera down to inspect his stomach and found that a large mass has prevented his stomach from expanding right. It's kind of like a huge obstruction to the point the vets couldn't get a good diagnosis. They just know the mass is there and is probably the cause of him vomitting his food back up. There was nothing that could be done. Liquid diet didn't work either. So my sister had to make the final decision today.

We took him for one last visit to the park today. We drove him out to Sunnybrook park where there is a leash free zone for dogs. There were quite a few ppl and a LOT of dogs out there today. However, he was already pretty weakened and didn't play or run around much. It was pretty disheartening, but we knew that after so long that this was the best he could do. He lost a lot of weight already (from 26 lbs to 18). Finally, we took him to the vet for the last and final time. It was quite emotional. My sister just bawled after it was over. It was quite a sad scene. My big sis was there too and I really didn't know what to say. Times like this reminds me of our own eventual mortality... while I can only appear saddened by today, I honestly dread the inevitable in the far future. I know I will bawl my eyes out for those times.

Goodbye Baby. We'll always love you and cherish all the happy moments that you've given my sister and our family. You'll be sorely missed. RIP.

OMG I just saw an XBOX HUEG plane!

Working near the airport today. Just went to CIBC to grab some cash for lunch. Just as I step out of the bank, an aircraft was taking off from Pearson International. I look up just expecting the regular run-of-the-mill passenger jets, but no. Instead, I find myself staring at the huge-ass Antonov AN-124-100 cargo jet taking off. It was breath-taking... it's huge, it's loud... damn I wish I had a camera! Would've made an AWESOME picture... sigh... I think that just made my day a whole lot brighter. =)

(For those of you who don't share my love for aviation... meh. =P)
(EDIT: To respond to flo's criticism of the picture, the fact is that this aircraft is the 2nd largest plane in the world. So there! =P)

Pic for views! (It's very similar to this one. I wonder if it's the same one...)



(DOUBLE EDIT: Will this pic help you see how HUEG this plane is flo?? =P)



Photos courtesy of Airliners.net

The ladies asked me to take a hike again. How can I refuse? =P

Yep... another hiking trip. Actually, this is only the 3rd one I've been on so far. Went to my old stomping grounds in Hamilton surprisingly. We went to Webster's falls and actually went all the way around the place. Too bad not everyone got there on time due to extenuating circumstances. However, it was quite fun. It was very similar to the Tiffany Fall's trip I took w/ MCCC awhile back. Quite nice, but tiring. Ended up sleeping from 7pm until midnight. Seeing there was no point in staying up since I had to work this morning, went back to sleep until 4:30 this morning. I missed dinner and didn't even feel it. Not good.

Gotta go again sometime. Damn, golf season is almost over too. Getting cold... Old Man Winter is soon approaching. Can't believe another year has gone by so quickly... and without much progress in this thick skull of mine. Dammit brain, do something!